otoh

:cycle:
On Sunday afternoons, he naps.
That makes it hard to sleep on Sunday nights.
He gets a couple hours in before he has to get up for work.
Most weeks.
Sometimes he’s up all night.
All week long he throws himself into his job.
Not much time for home or family.
His kids go out with friends.
His wife stays out of his way.
She has given up.
He tries not to think about it.
Friday nights he pops open the beer.
And the pack of cigarettes.
He only smokes and drinks on weekends.
That makes it okay.
He doesn’t have a problem.
Through the haze of the smoke.
He sees his lover.
From 20 years ago.
Ghostly and unreachable.
The haze blends into the fog of the alcohol.
Somehwere in the night he passes out.
Only to wake up and continue.
Because the haze and the fog are more comfortable.
Than his life has become.
All day and all night.
He sits and sips and smokes.
On Sunday mornings he stops.
On Sunday mornings he knows he hasn’t kissed his wife.
On Sunday mornings he knows he hasn’t held his children.
On Sunday mornings he feels the loss.
On Sunday mornings he resolves to change.
On Sunday mornings he cries.
:recycle:

Technorati tags: blog~personal~otoh~poetry

Hi there, welcome to Wal-Mart.

I’m just practicing, of course. In light of the recent decision by the Supreme Court [read about it here or listen to it here] it would apparently be okay for the government to take my personal web space and use it for commercial development.

Now, a WalMart or a Target store site would certainly attract more traffic. I’d like to think the content would be less interesting, but I’m a little egotistical that way.

Of course, the case for Eminent Domain dealt with local governments taking people’s homes, not their web sites. That just makes it, oh about a million times worse. I support the very limited use of eminent domain when the land is for PUBLIC use. Economic development of commercial property is, imho, way too broad an interpretation of public use.

I’m not very politically active and I don’t rant a lot in this blog, but this decision just absoluely floored me! This is almost as surreal as the beginning of the Hitchhiker’s Guide….

Technorati tags: blog~personal~otoh~rant

The American Film Institute has broadcast its 100 Years… 100 Movie Quotes. As expected, there were some notable quotes missing from the final cut. Some of these weren’t even in the 400 quotes that were nominated. Go figure!

For example, while they had a quote from The Blues Brothers (1980), it was not this one:

Elwood: It’s 106 miles to Chicago, we’ve got a full tank of gas, half a pack of cigarettes, it’s dark and we’re wearing sunglasses.
Jake: Hit it.

The film Slingblade (1996) didn’t even warrant a nomination, so this wasn’t on the show either:

Karl: Mmm.

Better Off Dead (1985) wasn’t nominated, so you can scratch:

Johnny: I want my two dollars!

They quoted The African Queen (1951), but missed my favorite from that film:

Rose Sayer: I never dreamed that any mere physical experience could be so stimulating!

And I really didn’t expect The Lost Boys (1987) to be on the list, but I would have loved to see this:

Sam Emerson: Look at your reflection in the mirror. You’re a creature of the night Michael, just like out of a comic book! You’re a vampire Michael! My own brother, a goddamn, shit-sucking vampire.

Anyone care to point out more omissions? We can make our own list!

Technorati tags: blog~personal~otoh~movies

In the middle of dinner one time, my date looked across the table at me and said, “You don’t see things like normal people, do you?” Nope, and it’s actually a trait I’m often proud of although I have learned to blend in and not look like a social misfit quite so much.

I was reminded recently of a trip to Disney’s Magic Kingdom. Even though I live near several big theme parks, I rarely visit them unless I’m with out-of-town guests. For most people, going through It’s a Small World once is enough to last a lifetime. It took WAY too much of my life to get that song out of my head…. (While making that link I see that even on their official website it says, “After it’s over, just try to get that tune out of your head.” Who knew?) But on this particular trip I found myself sitting in one of those stupid little boats and hearing that insipid song yet again. This time though I was with one of my nieces who was five years old at the time.

OMG! Everyone should see Disney World with a five-year-old. She was so excited by every one of those little dolls. Even the song seemed less annoying. Later that night, she sat on my shoulders while we watched the fireworks with similar enthusiasm. For most of that day, I saw things through her eyes and it opened my own.

Oh, and I finally saw Finding Neverland a few days ago. It’s a good thing I’m a hard-hearted curmudgeon or I might have cried at the end of it….

Technorati tags: blog~personal~otoh~movies

I’m quite at home inside my head
wherever I might be
I don’t need booze or pills or weed
to alter reality

I travel far and wide you see
wherever my body’s at
I’m quite at home inside my head
home is where I hang my hat

Technorati tags: blog~personal~otoh~poetry

Cat at 2 With Spirit suggested a Show and Tell theme for posts. Rather than show an object, here is a photo of my pups, Peanut and Pooter.

The story I have to tell will lose a little because, just as with the people that I write about, I have used pseudonyms for the pups. (Besides, didn’t we all learn something from Paris Hilton about publicizing a pet’s name that might also be used to get a network password? And who would ever have dreamed that we could learn anything from Paris Hilton? But I digress….)

Pooter appears to be mostly schnauzer and is about ten years old. I got her when she was about a year old from a rescue organization that brings pets to a local Petsmart on weekends. I saw her there three weekends in a row while I was trying to decide if I really wanted to accept the responsibility of adopting a dog. She followed me easily, but it took about 20 minutes to coax her out of the car when I brought her home. Ironically, one of the reasons I chose her is because she was the only dog that did not bark at everyone that walked by the front of the store. Within a week of bringing her home she showed how territorial she can be and now growls and barks at everyone that comes near the house. No one will ever sneak up on me while Pooter is around!

Peanut appears to be mostly chow and was a stray that I found two years after I got Pooter. I had gone to see As Good as it Gets at the dollar theater. On my way back to my car I saw a man at the edge of the parking lot. At his feet was a tiny, skinny, pup. She was all skin and bones and covered in fleas. She did this thing where she put her chin on the ground and looked up at you while she slowly inched forward, trailing her back legs behind her. The guy said he had just found her there. He couldn’t take her, but was reluctant to just walk away.

I took her home and bathed her. I took her to the vet the next day. She was about 12 pounds and they guessed she was about 12 weeks old. Other than being underweight and flea-infested, she appeared to be alright. I put signs up at all the businesses around the area where I found her on the chance that she was just lost, not abandoned. In less than a week, she and Pooter were playing together and I realized — I have two dogs now. No one ever called to claim her.

About a year after I adopted Peanut, a nurse at the vet’s office commented on how timid she is. I had never been around chows before and I never really did a lot of research when I first adopted her. I have since learned that they have a reputation as a breed for being very aggressive. They do have a very powerful, stocky build. Peanut is the most timid creature I have ever seen. She also barks when anyone approaches, but she backs away while she does. They also tend to be very much one-person dogs and that is certainly true of my Peanut.

Now, this is the part that won’t make as much sense without knowing their real names. When I adopted Pooter the family that had her first had named her Pongo. That was the name of the daddy dog in 101 Dalmations. Since she had no dalmation heritage that I can tell and is female, I felt okay with renaming her. The name I chose has one connotation that is computer-related. (I was working as a network administrator at the time.) When I adopted Peanut I had a difficult time choosing her name. Since chows are a Chinese breed I looked up Chinese names online. I almost chose Mei Mei, which means little sister. That would have been appropriate I think. But the name I ended up picking is the Chinese equivalent of Pooter’s real name. In a way, I have two dogs with the same computer-related name. And that is one of the geekiest revelations I will ever make about myself.

Oh, and the damnedest thing: the pups are glad to see me EVERY SINGLE DAY!

What we find precious are common materials forged in uncommon circumstances. Rubies are aluminum oxide, pearls are calcium carbonate, diamonds are carbon. Aluminum, oxygen, calcium, carbon. All so very common. As are we.

Cut: Most gemstones are not very pretty when they are pulled from the earth. It takes an expert’s eye to see the potential within. The careful cutting away of waste and polishing leads to fire and brilliance. We all start out like diamonds in the rough. But we have to develop our own facets. Forgive me for still being a little rough. Pearls are beautiful when we find them, but they are the result of the oyster trying to protect itself from some irritation like a grain of sand. We take irritations and turn them into wars. I feel so evolved.

I’m just an old chunk of coal
But I’m gonna be a diamond some day
I’m gonna glow and grow
‘Til I’m so blue pure perfect

Color: The color differences in gems can be so subtle that they are imperceptable except when compared side-by-side with another stone. We naturally make comparisons. (One of these things is not like the other….) We are alike, but not the same. And if you look closer, I am not exactly what you thought I was. As I get to know you better, as I look closer, you are not exactly what I thought you were either. We may look at life through rose-colored glasses or spend our nights feeling blue. But we need to remember that our color comes from the inside, not the outside.

I’m gonna put a smile on everybody’s face
I’m gonna kneel and pray everyday
Lest I should become vain along the way
I’m just an old chunk of coal, now Lord
But I’m gonna be a diamond some day

Clarity: Every gem has imperfections. That’s largely what makes them unique. Our flaws may be minor surface blemishes or fractures hidden deep within, but we all have them. We cheat on our spouses, we abuse our children, we lie to our families, we betray our friends, we fight with our neighbors, we steal from strangers, we hate ourselves. But put us in the right light and none of that is visible. We choose our light to hide our flaws.

I’m gonna learn the best way to walk
I’m gonna search and find a better way to talk
I’m gonna spit and polish my old rough-edged self
Til I get rid of every single flaw

Carat: F*ck, I don’t know. Every analogy breaks down at some point. Maybe in v2.

Setting: Gemstones are beautiful in themselves, but in the context of a ring or necklace that beauty can be multiplied. The right setting enhances our appearance, the wrong one diminishes it. In our blogs, in our lives, we choose our surroundings and what to display. Some of us choose to display our faults and rough edges. Some of us give hints and glimpses. Some of us hide all but a facet or two.

I’m gonna be the World’s best friend
I’m gonna go around shaking everybody’s hand
Hey, I’m gonna be the cotton-pickin’ Rage of the Age
I’m gonna be a diamond some day

Sometimes I am disappointed when I see a flaw in someone I admire and respect. Usually I am dismayed when I see the flaws in myself. We are not perfect, but that’s what makes us unique and beautiful. Besides, we are all still works in progress.

No one that looks like this has EVER made an offer like this to me. And I expect never will. I’m just saying….

Taught and tawny
Buff and brawny
Teasing tongues, trembling sighs
Lips warm and wet and willing

Breaths caught and cast
Heat rising fast
Probing fingers, quivering thighs
Lips hot and wet and yielding

Desparation
Penetration
Muffled moans, stifled cries
Skin sizzles at each touch

Chain reaction
Satisfaction
A little death in life
Skin never felt so much

I seem to be reliving my childhood. Maybe it’s just the sentimentality I always feel as the school year ends. But yesterday’s post reminded me of another song.

Comet, it makes your mouth turn green
Comet, it tastes like gasoline
Comet, it makes you vomit
So get some Comet and vomit today!

This one uses the tune from Bridge on the River Kwai (Colonel Bogey March). A quick search online found variations that included Listerene and Vasoline, but those are just silly.

So far the most comments I have ever gotten had “crap” and “gopher guts” in the titles. (Even though some of the comments under gopher guts followed a tangent, I’m counting them dammit.) I think I have found my audience! And I have great hopes for “puke”.

My friends pulled me into the gutter. It was a big step up for me….