otoh

Most people that know me or work with me (the latter not necessarily fully inclusive of the former — or should that be the other way around?) will tell you that I am very patient and usually polite. Usually. There are a couple notable exceptions.

Some days “The System” sucks the life right out of me. Some days frustration leads to utter despair… or anger. Like the song says, “Some days are diamonds. Some days are stones.” Last Friday was a stone.

I got an email from a coworker that came out of left field and had the potential to make my job a lot harder. And I started writing a reply, got two paragraphs into it and then typed, “You know what, I need to stop typing now because I’m really pissed off.” Now at that point I normally would realize that I was in no state to be putting things into print, delete the whole thing , and take a walk looking for a cat to kick or something to throw. But no. I sent it. Not just to the individual. To a group.

I’d like to say that it made me feel lots better. I’d like to say that the coworker expressed concern over my agitation. I’d like to say things that could get me into lots more trouble if they got out from here…. But instead I had a pounding headache by the time I left work. Instead any responses by the coworker were not directed to me. Instead I stayed pissed off most of the weekend. Instead I apologized today and made a compromise that I really didn’t want to make (nor think that I should have to make). Today is better than Friday, but it ain’t exactly sparkly. Still, there’s a smile on my face [painted] and a song in my heart [Some days are diamonds. Some days are stones. Sometimes the hard times won't leave me alone. Sometimes a cold wind blows a chill in my bones. Some days are diamonds. Some days are stones.]

You know what, I need to stop typing now….

[P.S. I know this sounds all doom and gloom, but I'm really pretty much over it now. Otherwise I never would have posted it here.]