I’m a Have-Been

I have been on a mountain.
I have been under an ocean.
I have been on the other side of the planet.
I have been out of my mind.
I have been chatted up.
I have been talked about.
I have been the last to know.
I have been the first to admit it.
I have been alone.
I have been lonely.
I have been on the fringe.
I have been on the outside looking in.
I have been faithful.
I have been a believer.
I have been cheated on.
I have been a fool.
I have been a cabbage-patch uncle.
I have been a best man.
I have been childish.
I have been childlike.
I have been nearly near death.
I have been depressed.
I have been shy.
I have been a wallflower.
I have been smart.
I have been stupid.
I have been better.
I have been worse.

I have been drunk now for over two weeks. [No, wait. That was Jimmy Buffet, not me.]