Shiny Objects

Over at The Collective they’ve been posting about their crushes [and inviting us to do so too]. I’ve heard that no one forgets their first crush. You may have many others throughout your years — your memories of them blur and fade. But that first one….

Her name was [I suppose it still is] Elizabeth — a blue-eyed blonde. I was in first grade and she was in second [an older woman!]. I was [and am] very shy and [given my age, understandably] immature. [My immaturity is less understandable now....] So naturally I never told her that I liked her [LIKED her liked her]. But I still remember vividly that that was the first time I was so aware of another person. I can’t explain why I would care what she wore, what she said, what she thought, whether she noticed me. I only know that I did. Attraction is a strange and wonderful force. [I'm strange. She's wonderful.]

I don’t know how long I pined after her. [Pine, punishment, and pain all come from common linguistic roots. Does this surprise anyone?] Her family moved away the next year and my crushes rarely survive long distances [unless, like celebrity crushes, they started out that way]. Crushes, infatuations, unrequited [or imaginary] love — I have a much different perspective these days. I’m not immune, but I know they are transitory and they are anything but romantic.