Given Up

I don’t remember how long ago I heard this joke [or where] but apparently I’ve never posted it here before. Plus, apologies in advance if I offend anyone’s sensibilities. It’s just a joke. And it’s the only Lent joke I can think of right now. I know some Christmas jokes and some Easter jokes and generally religious jokes [I'm related to some of them... bah DUM bum....] but this might be the only Lent joke I know. If there are others, put them in the comments for me. OK?

A buddy of mine told me that he and his wife decided to give up sex for Lent. [Other than as a set-up for this joke, I have NO idea why they might think this is a good idea.]

The first week, he told me wasn’t terribly difficult. After several years of marriage, the occasional sexless week wasn’t unheard of.

The second week, they were both a bit on edge. He started running every evening and she renewed her gym membership. Might as well get some physical benefits along with the spiritual, they figured.

The third week he started sleeping in another room just so they wouldn’t “accidentally” have relations. [And still they somehow thought this was a good idea?]

By the fourth week they could hardly be in the same room together. That’s when it happened. As he described it, “I handed her the potatoes and our hands touched. Suddenly, all the sexual tension was just too much and we started ripping each other’s clothes off. Of course, they threw us out.”

“Wow,” I said, “they threw you out of the church for that?”

“No… the grocery store….”