Oh, Nose!
Lady Heather Hyacinth Heath returned to Heath Manor after wintering in a Bahamian spa. She had left the estate in the care …
Dead Giveaway
I reread the text for the ad: Free to good home. Serious inquiries only. No delivery, must be willing to come and …
Fatale Attraction
So I met her at the local coffee shop. You know, the one on this side of the street and not the …
Social Santa
To the tune of “Santa Claus is Coming to Town” You better not sext you better not spoof you better not troll …
First Contact
Scene: Two women drinking coffee and talking. “It was incredibly awkward.” “Really? How so?” “Well, first he didn’t know where to put …
Andie
“Hello?” It was my phone. No, not someone calling me on my phone; it was my freakin’ phone talking to me. I …
The Grey Mile
“They gave him the chair?” “They said he asked for it.” “Still, it seems extreme.” “Well, when you look at all he’s …
Tea in the Garden with Teresa
Teresa poured two cups of tea. “How do you take it?” she asked. “Cream and sugar or are you a lemon person?” …
Ruminate on This
“Doctor?” “What’s the Beef?” “It looks like Mad Cow.” The patient was lying on a Guernsey. “Looks like you got a Bum …
The Nature of the Beast
I was unceremoniously dismissed. Considering the fact that I had never officially been employed, it came as something of a shock. It …
Miss Matched
I stood at the door, flowers and box of candy in hand — daisies and cherry cordials, as my research indicated those …
Estate Planning for the Undead, Part 3 – Ghosts
Okay, everybody — and I use the term “body” loosely — we’re ready to start the final session of our seminar. Welcome …